Part 4: The Trap of All-or-Nothing Thinking

Do you ever notice yourself swinging between extremes? One week you’re on top of everything; the next, it all feels impossible. This “all-or-nothing” pattern is especially common with ADHD.

It often shows up in therapy as “If I can’t do it perfectly, I won’t do it at all.” That mindset can keep people stuck, cycling between hyperfocus and avoidance.

Why this happens

• ADHD brains seek stimulation, leading to bursts of high output followed by stalls when tasks feel dull.

• Perfectionism reinforces the idea that only complete or flawless effort counts.

• Time blindness disrupts pacing, making tasks feel either overwhelmingly urgent or invisible.

• Emotional intensity heightens both motivation surges and shutdowns.

Strategies that help

• Adopt a progress mindset: Even partial completion reduces overwhelm and builds momentum.

• Set flexible, realistic goals: Scale expectations to energy and context, preventing cycles of burnout.

• Celebrate incremental wins: Reinforce effort and partial progress to strengthen consistency over perfection.

Closing thought

Life isn’t meant to be lived in extremes. Finding middle ground helps ADHD brains thrive with more consistency and less burnout.

(Leads into Part 5: Hyperfocus.)